If you are married, does your spouse support you being a sissy crossdresser?

[cutepatti]

I am in my 2nd marriage. My first wife died several years ago and knew of my crossdressing but preferred I keep it to myself. I have since remarried a male-to-female transgender who not only is a great companion/partner/lover but also fully supports me in all ways. Just curious about others on here who are married and what your spouse thinks about your sissy self. Both of my wives have been great as partners, but my current wife has opened up a lot of doors for me that never were before.

[cutepatti]

  No responses to this post yet. Maybe nobody is interested or just too shy to open up to this question? Sharing our experiences might be a good thing for this forum. I'm willing to open up if others are. If not I'll ask Betty to take down this post for lack of interest. At least I'm trying to generate some discussion. Thx. Patti

[Betty]

Sadly, most people who like the sissy or ABDL lifestyles & fantasies, are either single, separated, divorced, or it is not supported by their family & spouse.

So most of them don't want to talk about it. Many keep it a secret from who they're living with or their loved ones. They don't even want to talk about it in a public forum for fear that someone they know will stumble on it, & make the connection to them.

Some who do have a loved one who knows about their crossdressing, would not open up about their sissy or an ABDL side of it. Indeed, I see a few here that also visit CD sites talking about a new skirt, nylons, or heels, but never mention their sissy side there, & almost never utter a word here, even though they visit here 1-14 times a week.

Indeed, being a bit of an "underground" site, with more privacy & security than most sites (some banks & most stores should be so secure), is a big attraction for those want to keep their fantasies a secret. We may be able to easily find Betty's through a simple google search, but if they're using an ISP or tools typically used by bad guys, hackers, blackmailers, & trolls, more often than not they can't see the contents of our sissy pages. At Stories, if you use a bad ISP, hacker tools, & bad tricks when visiting the page, you'll get a 404 error message that we don't even exist.

[cutepatti]

THX for the info Betty. And I can understand what you are saying about privacy, etc. Seems we are mostly anonomous on here so I thought that would allow us all to open up about things that others on here would understand and appreciate sharing our feelings without worry. But I'm still a newbie and maybe need to 'learn the ropes' of how these wonderful forums operate. Thank you!

[Angela M...]

Hi cutepatti,
like Betty said many here consider this a private and personal matter. Like myself it brings up bad memories of always having to hide my Kinky side from family. Then there are the times we were discovered and punished for something we could not really help ourselves avoid. My girly side and the dressing up were a constant nagging issue that I tried to hide away many times but no matter how many times I purged my collection of girls things I would be drawn back into it again and again. Some who follow here may be cross dressers or like myself are convinced they should have been born a girl but we do feel somewhat anonomous posting here under Betty's care.
   

[cutepatti]

THX Angela for such a great response. I feel much the way that you do, with the lifelong feelings of being a girl and having to repress/hide it most of my life. In early years not understanding why I felt the way I did and having no information, feeling like I was a freak and that I was the only little boy in the world who had these strange but wonderful feelings. And now I still feel like a little girl trapped in an adult male body. And it has caused me to do a lot of hurtful things along the way just beause I didn't really know how to control it and acted out in hurtful ways, to myself and especially to my 1st wife. Now I am married to someone who understands my feelings and lets me be whatever I need to be. I'm not blaming my 1st wife for any of what I was doing and she put up with a lot beause she loved me even if she couldn't deal well with my girlish feelings. I only blame myself. I think we all have a lot in common and that's why I posted this here. Hopefully more will not be afraid to express their feelings. Thank you. 

[Angela M...]

Hi cutepatti,
I too thought I was the only boy with feelings like that. I started dressing in my sisters dresses and panties at about age four and being the only boy in an all female household it was thought of as cute. I had very blond shoulder length hair as mom thought it was nice and we could not afford for me to get it cut anyway. When I played dress up with my sister I was one of the girls, (we lived with my grandma and three aunts) so it was tolerated. Dad came home from the war and they promptly had me and my sister a year apart so he  was working quite a bit when he could and was not around much. When I was about five or six he came home and saw us playing in our room with me dressed up but he thought it was another of my sisters friends. When I came downstairs and said "do I look pretty daddy" he freaked and grabbed me and our coats and we got my hair cut very short right away. Mom & I were devastated and I cried quite a bit after that. I never liked him much after that and he was always trying to get me to be a man, pushing me into football or some other manly sport. When we moved to Canada we were away from all my aunts and he searched the neighbourhood for a boy for me to play with even pushing me to join the Scouts with a boy across the road who I did not like very much. I just wanted to play with my sister and her friends so that plan of his did not work for long. Being a little English boy in Canada in October, I was the only one to go to school in my school uniform with a blazer and short pants. In winter I was walking through knee deep snow and freezing to death so mom put me into my sisters tights and I loved it. Well being white tights with other kids teasing me all the time I was in tears most days coming home but we could not afford long pants at the time so I suffered the teasing but enjoyed wearing the tights. I had many other adventures dressing in girls things growing up and in my early teens told mom and my doctor that I was not a boy and something was wrong. I went through many tests and the doctor said I had low testosterone and perhaps higher estrogen levels but I would grow out of it. I don't really think that ever happened though.   

[cutepatti]

Wow Angela, that was a truly heart-felt account of your life. It proves how many of 'us' had to face so many issues growing up because of feelings we had that we, nor could anyone else, understand. Nor did they really even want to understand, just wanted 'us' to conform to what we were 'supposed' to be. I didn't experience what you did even though I felt the way you did. I kept it hidden because I felt ashamed and confused and knew I could not reveal myself to anyone. So I've always been the classic closet sissy/crossdresser. I truly feel like I was 'forced' to be a male and just did it the best I could and was quite successful doing it even though Patti was always what kept me going. My biggest regret and frustration is that my sexuality became confused also and self-stimulation became my outlet of enjoyment of my girl self. And it still is to a large extent. But I hate that it is. Sweet girls should be good girls and this one carries a lot of guilt for something I have never been able to control. I hope this makes sense to you but I truly wish I could have either been born a girl or been able to accept that I am a guy. Would have been a much easier life. At least I am now fortunate to be married to someone who I can be free to be me. Not that I dress like a girl or live like one now because of this new freedom, but I certainly could if I wanted to. And I can be open in any way I desire to be. Whew.....seems we can open up about ourselves on here once a few of us are comfortable enough to do it.

[Angela M...]

You are right about our sexuality being blurred to some degree. Unlike what some people think, it is not all Black & White in many species on this planet of ours with some animals changing sex if needs be and some with both genders. That could have been our problem, as our bodies could not really decide which way to go and led us to very confusing times. Like many people today who say "I just prayed I would wake up a girl" I wished this every day of my life from a very early age and still do some days but of course it is beyond happening. I have lately been thinking, after reading so much about girls raped and kidnapped and sold into sexual slavery, would I still wish to be a girl in these times. Perhaps these things always happened but today we hear much more news than ever before with Social Media being what it is. The pull to live life as a girl is a pretty strong one so I think my answer would still be YES pick me, let me be the girl I was always meant to be. I do think I am jealous of transgender kids today who have so much help and many being out there for the public to learn about. Having said that, I am not going all Kaitlyn Jenner in my future as I cannot afford it for one and my family are still very close so I do not want to hurt them. 

[katrina_au]

Hi! Yes my wife does. She's thrown away the old mens underwear and buys me panties now and then. Always wants me to "change" when I get home- often into petticoat and nightie (babydoll in summer). I mentioned when we were dating, went OK - seeing she had few quirks of her own then I thought why not. It's give and take, something we must all remember (soooo easy to go too far at times). I've some pretty pink sissy dresses that she finds nice - especially when serving her tea or running a bubble bath or massaging her feet. Always give a bit. I'm not "lucky" - it's communicating at the start - something a little easier when was Internet dating.. can make the odd mention of.. "morning! just having breakfast a little lazy still in my nightie..." etc. :-)

Congratulations on your new marriage; sounds like a lovely partner. And same - you accept each other.

Hugs
Katrina x